One thing that never ceases to amaze me about being a mom is my ability to go into “medical-mommy mode” when necessary. By that I mean, if Brennen is at the doctor’s and he has to be restrained so he can get a shot or a procedure done, I am the one that holds him down.
I dread going into medical-mommy mode, but it is a necessary evil. And unfortunately in Brennen’s 3 years, I have had countless experiences of going into medical mommy mode. From his newborn screen, to breathing treatments, to vaccinations, sweat tests and countless other procedures that I do not care to relive.
Today was another medical-mommy day.
Brennen was scheduled for an MRI this morning to rule out cerebral palsy as the reason for his toe walking. I have been dreading this appointment since I made it. The MRI itself didn’t worry me, it was the sedation I was concerned about.
While we were in the waiting room, I could hear a little girl crying and crying and crying. Which just increased my anxiety. Eventually it was Brennen’s turn. He did great until IV time. Then he clung to me and cried. I tried to stay strong for him. I held him while they put the IV in and tried to console him as best I could. But I have to admit that despite being in medical-mommy mode, my eyes did tear up when he wasn’t looking.
Once he fell asleep the hubby and I kissed him as he was rolled away to the MRI. We waited for a very long half hour.
When we saw him in recovery he was a little groggy. As he started to come to, he said, “I want mommy.” At that point I finally was able to breath and I was able to let go of medical-mommy mode. Well … at least until his next appointment.