Today my Dad would have been 55.
Instead, it has been over 20 years since I’ve seen him.
It always amazes me that after all these years, the pain of not having my Dad around is just as strong as the day that it happened. They say time heals all wounds but I am not sure if that is entirely true because some wounds can just not be healed. Time does help the wound not feel as fresh and time helps you to find ways to cope, but the wound definitely does not completely heal.
And while not having my Dad around is certainly sad for me, I am actually more sad for my son’s sake. B never got to meet my Dad….his Grandpa.
Recently, B has taken an interest in learning more about his family and thus asks about his Grandpa often. Death is a hard topic to broach with a 7 year old but I try to be as honest as possible while still being age appropriate. And while his questions are sometimes difficult to answer for a myriad of reasons, I appreciate his interest in learning about who he is and where he comes from.
I like that he wants to talk about his Grandpa and learn all about him. I like that he tells me that he loves his Grandpa and misses him even though they never met. I love that he likes to look at old pictures with me and tell me that he wishes he could have met his Grandpa.
I wish they could have met too….I think that they would have been good buddies.
So this year, for my son’s sake, we are doing something different to celebrate my Dad’s birthday. We are making a cake, putting up some decorations and even blowing out some candles. It is what B wants to do. We are going to celebrate the life that my Dad did have, albeit it one far too short.
And tomorrow? Tomorrow the celebration continues as I get the pleasure of going to a Garth Brooks concert. Most of you already know that I am one of Garth’s biggest fans and that is owed all to my Dad. I grew up on Garth’s music and just about every one of Garth’s songs has a memory of my Dad tied to it.
Music has a way of taking you back to a special place and time and Garth’s music takes me back to a much simpler and carefree time. It is no coincidence that my Dad’s birthday lined up so perfectly with a Garth concert. The universe has a funny way of giving you exactly what you need when you need it. (I’m also going to see Garth again next weekend because he is here two weekends in a row. I couldn’t resist!)
So if you happen to be a country music fan, put on some Garth music today in memory of my Dad.